Drowning (almost) 101!

In the post-Resurrection Gospel of Lk. 24:35-48, we read of how Jesus appeared once again to the disciples breathing peace upon their frightened spirits!  Fear encompassed every part of their being.  Luke describes them as scared half to death – terrified, startled, troubled. 

Fear is part of our humanness – it can be an emotion that cautions us to the dangers that may make us vulnerable.  Fear can also be paralyzing and limiting as we are faced with options on our journey of life.

I recall that when I was between 7 and 9 years of age, I was afraid of water – especially, when I was supposed to swim at the city pool with my friends.  I signed up for swimming lessons again and again.  Every time the Station near the ropes in the middle of the pool was part of my test for the lesson, I quit.  The ropes, the deep water beyond the ropes, and my inability to touch the bottom, all added to my experience of being scared half to death!  One day, while standing at the edge of the pool (near the deep end) someone pushed me in.  I can feel even today what that experience of slipping into possible drowning had been – the surprise of the hands on my back, the coldness of the water, the sounds above the water, the pulsing of the water in my ears, my chest getting tighter and tighter as I tried to hold my breath.  I tried to reach up to the light above the water, but I was in too deep and there were too many other kids in the pool that made it difficult for me to grasp the edge of the pool.  I was running out of breath pretty fast – just taking in mouthfuls of chorine-tasting water.  The lifeguard, just about 6 ft. above me, finally noticed me, along with someone shouting, “Hey, someone’s drowning down there.”  The next thing I remember, I woke up in the lifeguard’s arms.  Cool!  I made it through.

Later – much later – in life, I met Sr. Rosie.  She was a certified lifeguard who promised that she could teach me to swim.  We went every Monday night for six months to the near-by college pool where she taught me how to swim like a minnow and to move on up to become a whale!  I found that when I could “go beyond the ropes,” I discovered that the deeper water carried me and it was easier to swim.  When I felt fearful or tired, I just turned over and floated!

So what does this have to do with discernment?  Everything!

Discernment is that process that calls for a willingness to be open; a willingness to face our fears; a willingness to look at them directly and ask:  “Who are you? Where do you come from?  Can we talk?” (Decision Making and Spiritual Discernment by Nancy L. Bieber)  One important movement in the process of discernment is the grace of willingness.  That is, the willingness to let go of resistance and to step into the deep waters of Call, courage, search, faith, and trust.  And when you feel overwhelmed with the flood of choices – just “turn over and float” with Centering Prayer, breathing exercises, quieting music, or just sitting still to hear God whisper, “Peace be with you.”